the movement

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How do you navigate the wild unknown?

Toni is a friend and former student who shared this reflection with me, and with her permission (thank you, Toni) I share it with you.

The past two and half years have been greatly enhanced for me by our classes as I’ve navigated how to live alone for the first time in my long life, cope with grief and pain without boring others with what my dearest friend calls our “old lady organ recitals” and find surprising joy in quiet mindfulness and meditation, recent practices which have been a real boon to this former pragmatic skeptic.

It’s a grand thing to change course so late in life.

Molte grazie, Frances, from your student with one working arm and leg! 

May all your dreams be sweet and gentle. 

Namaste, shalom and peace.  Toni

Toni transitioned earlier this year, and I am grateful to her for sharing her delight in lifelong learning with me.  Toni was a student of Ikebana, the Japanese art of flower arrangement.  The above photo is one of her pieces she titled “Almost Spring.”  She explained to me her process of observing and honoring the way the flowers, leaves, and stems, naturally occur, rather than forcing artificial shapes in her art.  Toni brought this same creativity with her into our ELDER Lymphatic Flow and Chair Yoga class.  As is usual in environments like wellness classes and body work practices, folks in the community share insights on what they are learning mind-heart-body-soul.  Toni would ask questions about our practice and share observations of how she was growing, adapting, and adjusting the practice to meet her own needs.

Toni’s homeland was Australia.  On occasion we would trade stories of sights, sounds, smells, and experiences of the vast continent.  Together we would marvel over the wild and wondrous country.  I remember in one conversation Toni shared with me,

“You know Frances, aging is like going into the wild unknown.”

Knowing Toni’s roots were in Australia I knew she was not playing around with the concept of wild.  I responded the only way one could, “Toni, please tell me more.” At the end of our chat that day, I asked her if I could write about her concept of how aging is like going into the wild unknown.  She (as always) graciously agreed and here we are. 

While humans have been birthed, grown, aged and transitioned for millennia, our experiences can feel uncharted.  Aging comes with having to traverse yet unfamiliar territory like minor or major shift(s) in how our own body-mind operates.  Some humans get to live long lives.  While that is a boon it often means we live longer than loved ones.  Grief at any age can push our emotional heart center into unrecognizable terrain.  As Toni would relate to me there are equally delights in wandering the wild unknown of aging, like her joy of newly found breath and movement practices, the art of Ikebana, the camaraderie of her mediation group and more.

I asked friends and colleagues for instances when they have felt they had to cross unfamiliar territory, perhaps you resonate with any of these examples.

  • The start of a school year. 

  • Having difficult conversations.

  • Moving from your home to assisted living.

  • Making new friends.

  • Learning to swim as an adult.

  • Having to lay completely still while in an MRI or CT scanner.

  • The first day at a new job or starting your own business.

  • Pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting.

  • Changing your dietary habits.

  • Recovery from an injury or surgery.

I further inquired what the outcomes were from their life experiences.  For all of the above examples and more, folks described varying degrees of,

  • Relief for having made it through what they perceived was tough.

  • Surprise at their inner ability (courage) to sojourn.

  • Satisfaction in having learned a new skill.

  • Gratitude for having got as far as they did.

  • Joy for expanding their horizons.  

Expanding experiences was a common touchstone in my chats with Toni.  We joked that instead of a telescope to look into outer space, mindful movement practices are like a telescope used to look into our inner space.  Toni explained to me that her growing inner awareness was helpful in her navigation of her wild unknown.  In asana practice we bring our attention to the posture of the spine and move with intention of lengthening.  The roots of yoga teach us this is a mind-body intelligence.  As we develop our practice, we move and breathe with courage and compassion.  The roots of yoga teach us this is heart-spirit expanded awareness.  In Toni’s case this skill in action went beyond our weekly classes into all aspects of her being. 

BKS Iyengar, yoga teacher and author of many books on yoga practice and philosophy gives us this wisdom on expansion that aligns with Toni’s self-observation of expanding inner awareness.

“Do not think of yourself as a small, compressed, suffering thing.  Think of yourself as graceful and expanding, no matter how unlikely it may seem at the time.”
― B.K.S. Iyengar, Light on Life

Mr. Iyengar was a lifelong yoga practitioner, with 96 years of experience.  When Toni first joined our classes, she shared with me she was a little apprehensive as she had not participated yoga before.  What enchantment for me to witness these similar and profound insights from long established and recent practices.    

I am blessed my path intersected with Toni.  Her reflections on navigating the wild unknown of aging have helped me along my own journey.  When I get stuck in a contracted state (the tight grip of fear) I breathe slow and deep and turn my telescope inward.  In doing so perhaps I simply locate my guiding stars and find my center.  With each breath constriction dissipates, my awareness expands, and I can navigate a new wild unknown.

Join us for breath and movement practices.  The invitation is to explore your infinite inner space.  The universe is expanding.  May we expand with it.

August 2023